Wedding etiquette: To have children or not to have children

Are you and your partner debating on whether to have children at your wedding? Well whichever direction your decision takes i’ll be giving you some tips on how to phrase your wedding invites politely and also how to successfully keep them entertained at your wedding if they are invited.

Many couples struggle to word their wedding invitations especially when their having an ‘adult only wedding’. Sometimes not including the child’s/children’s name/s on the invite will not be enough!

“How do we tell Abigail and Peter that their children will not be able to attend, without upsetting or offending them”? How do we make sure that they will still want to attend our wedding, even when their children are not invited”? These will probably be the type of questions running through your minds, but have no fear and make note of some of these wedding invitation etiquette tips:

“With respect, we would like our special day to be an adults only ceremony and reception. Thank you for understanding our wishes”

“Unfortunately we are unable to accommodate children. Thank you for understanding”

“Unfortunately, due to limited numbers, we are unable to accommodate children at our wedding”

Try to avoid the phrase “no children” as this can upset your guests and result in unnecessary tension and quarrels!

Other ways to get round the issue is to have RSVP cards that state something like: “We have reserved two seats in your honour, please RSVP to let us know if you will be joining us to celebrate our day of union”. If you have a wedding website, why not write the message on there. On the other hand, you can have close family and friends relay the message.

It is totally up to you and your partner if you want to invite children or not, but do bear in mind that there will be some weddings where it would not be appropriate to invite children. If you’re having a formal sit down style wedding, it may be difficult trying to settle restless children.


You may be inviting children to your wedding. Think about what you could provide, to keep them entertained so they are not disrupting speeches or running across the dance floor while you take your first dance.

You could dedicate a group of tables, laced with nibbles, crafts and crayons. Or maybe a room (remember to check if this comes at an extra cost) with activities and games, and a children’s entertainer. Children will really only need to be occupied during the speeches etc, so when this is all done and its time to hit the floor, it’ll certainly be fun to see what moves (good or bad) they’ve inherited from mum and dad.


Keep up with the latest: Twitter/ Facebook/ Pinterest

Image source: Style Me Pretty